Something I'm not fond of.

I was at another meeting last night, and while the word wasn't used the sentiment was implied.  It made me realise I dislike the whole idea.  Really, really dislike it.  The feeling kept me awake longer that it should have last night.

What is this idea you wonder?

First some background.  I love creativity.  To take a single idea, air it, freeing it and following where it goes.  Engaging with it's journey and documenting the results (no matter how weird, wonderful, or mundane even.)  Bringing something new into being.  Creativity is wonderful.

Working together in a group is great too.  Sharing ideas and planning new routes.  Coming together to a nexus with a shared goal in mind then multi-furcating (since often more than two are involved) to make something larger again.  Each mind creating from their single idea.  The sine wave, the plethora, the journey of many.  (Yes, even the disagreements and tensions.)

Policy (or protocol) is less appealing to me.  Although in large circles (or spirals or masses) of organisations these things are often necessary.

What I really, really, dislike is initiative.

Initiative raises one above the many.  One who declares they are above the group.  One who demands their own way.  One who delights in undermining the rest with their own ideas, forged in secret.  Ideas which impose a direction.

Initiative is praised.  Wrongly.  Initiative is the poison arrow to productivity.  It insists each be capable of running the show.  It is infection, swamping creative spirit in a black puss of ill-will and demoralization.

Initiative ignores the rules, corals ideas.  It leaves those playing properly with nothing left to do, nothing to add.  No contribution to make.  Behind the new leader, rushing to catch up.

The concept is bad enough, but I don't even like the word.  The letters in it are too pointy.

Times they must be a changin'

So, hi.

I've done this before, the blogging thing. I have a few in fact. My first blog was good for me, I wrote about a lot of stuff while I was at University. As my life unfolded, challenges were faced and I liked writing them down. Then some folk read it and objected to my writing about things I was no expert about. They expressed impolite corrections to my life experiences. I was young and it hurt a lot so I hid my blog and ultimately stopped writing there. I love writing though, the act of spilling ideas over a page into neat and tidy rows of characters. All that chaos, all the pain, the joy, the white noise of my mind swirls through the world and ends up so orderly. It's magic to me.

My other attempts at writing haven't been the same. In blog format, but restricted by a theme or idea. One for role-playing, one for baking. All left in the miasma of unfinished works. The list is still there, in my google+ account. Even the effluent of failed attempts stacks up neatly with the correct interpretation.

Anyway, hi.

I'm doing this again. Writing is comforting, it makes sense out of chaos. It creates order from a swirl of images, not all the time though. Sometimes my brain won't let me look at something head on, and then I cannot find the words to describe it. Defined things don't hang around for long though. They sit still, allowing themselves to be seen. Observed. Categorised. Defined. Then they nod at me in respectful recognition and fade from view. Ideas, the ones who are ready, like to be noticed. When you really see them though, their work is done and with a casual acceptance and comfortable passing they leave you to move on.

Moving on, hello!

I don't know who you are, and that doesn't matter. If you don't know who I am we never have to like each other. You can read, or not read. Absorb or forget. Follow or yawn and move away. That's all as it should be. I'm writing to make those neat little lines appear. Sometimes that's all I need to have. Maybe you read the lines, maybe you like making chaos from order. I know that some people have minds which work that way around. Minds which absorb order and allow creation. Creation is very chaotic. Creation shares ideas and makes new things and puts things in the world that weren't there before.

Oh, hi. You weren't there before.

Nice to see you, are you coming along?